Wednesday, June 11, 2014

I'm Terrible At This

Gosh I loooooooove this place. 

This past weekend was busy.  And chock full of really awesome choices.

It started with an impromptu bbq at a friends house on Friday.  I said I’d “drop by” and promised myself I’d have just 1 glass of wine because I had a run in the morning (I finish one half marathon, and now I think I’m a runner). 

Famous Last Words. 

A bottle of wine and many many hours later, with just a few hours sleep, I woke up to run a 5k.

You can probably imagine my mantra during this run: Don’t throw up.  Don’t throw up. 

Immediately following the run, I rushed home to shower and change to join a friend for the long drive up to West Hollywood for a baby shower.  Fun girl talk, cake and presents later, we then slowly inched home (101, I curse you) where I immediately met friends to watch the Kings game at a bar (apparently there is a sport called “hockey” on right now).  More fun chatting, cheering, and some drinks later, I finally got home, and promptly collapsed into bed. 

I was exhausted come Sunday morning.  But I promised a friend I’d go to church, followed by brunch.  And then I decided to do this:

Sit on my couch for 5 hours watching Game of Thrones.  (Spoiler Alert: Everyone DIES.) 

So, you know, I observed the Sabbath.  A-hem. 

Was this because I had nothing else to do?  Not exactly.  

Among the 137 things on my To Do list: 

  • study for a final exam (which I miraculously passed)
  • 4 loads of laundry (including something urgent and smelly)
  • return 13 voicemails (I seriously hate voicemails, sorry Mom)
  • shop for real food (dinner was salsa and a frozen chicken patty- super creative or just plain weird?)

As I pondered the end of my opposite-of-busy day, I thought: 

You make really bad decisions.  Do you have any idea what you're doing?

Sometimes this thought pervades all others: I’m terrible at this, at life.  

And then I took that thought and tossed it.  

The thing is, I know I'm making slow progress, taking life one day at a time.    

Sometimes it's ok to be, and not do (when a friend first shared this with me, I remember thinking: Aww, that's so cute.  I'm a doer, you see. But she couldn't be more right).  

And I'll bet this is true: no one really, truly has everything figured out.  

But thank goodness there's a God who does.    

But even the hairs of your head are all numbered.  Matthew 10:30

Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit.  Psalm 147:5

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